Reality sucks

Life's been pretty mundane these past few days except for the occasional dumb incidents which will crack me up. Well today I finally realized or should I say was pushed down to reality from cloud nine and saw how far back I was compared to my other classmates while doing a small quiz for my Computer Aided Design module. I was basically like a fish out of water or even like a bird without wings. I was flabbergasted, stunned, bewildered, no words could describe how I felt when I was staring at the question paper and at my almost blank computer screen. I was just lost. My mind was just blank like outer space. Seriously speaking, I hardly pay any attention in lectures except for one module. Fucked up right? My attendance is also another area which is in desperate need of change. All I see when I look at my attendance is a capital L and a number beside it ranging from 10 to 30. Full marks for anyone who guesses right what the L and number stand for. But why am I just telling myself to buck up when all I do is just ask for more breaks and do nothing in lectures and tutorials? All talk no action. Bloody idiot I am. Study I shall. To the books I go. Why am starting to talk like yoda from star wars? Oh and today I bought 8guppies for god knows what reason. Maybe I will strike toto tomorrow? We shall see.